Peek A Boo

Khai has this habit of turning up on his head like this all the time. He must do it 50 times a day minimum. He just stands there ... upside down. Watches TV, pokes at his toys, watches the kitties run by. He's so crazy. So darn cute.

Water..bla bla bla

The very next day another State Farm agent called me... this time the woman was much nicer than that Hugh Woods who called me Honey. She had no clue what he called about.. said she knows who he is but doesn't interact with him and she is sorry he treated me like crap. Oh..and get this..that jerk had the nerve to call my agent and tell him I was being rude and uncooperative!!! Thankfully Eric stood up for me and said he's known me for years and thats not me.. and that i'd only act that way if provoked.. or something of that nature. This woman who called said the tenants downstairs haven't filed a claim yet.. she has no clue who their agent is or who they are. The claim she's calling about is the one we filed. Uh..but we didn't file. We just told Eric what happened and he said to sit tight until the people below file something. Nobody knows whats going on.
This morning we see the lady from downstairs and John talks to her. She seems pissed off. Thinking she must be annoyed at us because of the whole situation. She used to be MUCH nicer to us.. now she's probably mad that they are being asked to pay money and because we make too much noise over their heads. I guess i'd be mad too...but its not like we did any of this on purpose! Bleh.

Water Drama Continues...6 months later

Back in June I flooded the kitchen causing a teeeny little damage to the neighbors downstairs. Nothing super major. Just water down their wall, some on their ceiling. Nothing that required MAJOR fixing. Certainly something John could have easily done. But whatever.. they wanted their insurance agent (State Farm) to look and fix it. Totally understand.. and its their right. They are really nice people too.
After the work was done, the husband called John to come take a look b/c he felt they did more than necessary. John looked..and yep..they tore an unneccessary huge hole in their ceiling and then repatched it.. among other things. Regardless..everything was fixed. I spoke to my agent (also State Farm) and he said not to worry... because really..State Farm can't charge State Farm.
6 months have passed and all of a sudden the wife from downstairs calls up John yesterday worried b/c her agent apparently has been giving them the run-around. I don't have the details of what was said...but it sounds to me like they've been billed for the repairs by whoever came out to fix it.. the whoever that the agent called...and now the agent is pulling some shit. THEN the agent calls John, who tells him to call our agent Eric. THEN today.. I get a call while i'm at work from Hugh Wood.. a claims rep from State Farm. He proceeds to badger and called me Honey. I don't like that. You don't know me and not only that... its unprofessional. I was not impressed. He kept pushing me and pushing me and wanted to know what happened. I told him he can speak to Eric, my agent. He ignored me and kept asking and pushing...and finally I interject and say
Excuse me that happened 6 months ago and MY state farm agent told me that if anyone calls you can contact him.
He says Why is that?
I said because he said so.
I felt like he was interrogating me like the fucking police. I told him that the tenants agent called us yesterday and badgered us well and too was directed to Eric.
He tells me Well this is the first I heard of it, I just got the claim yesterday.
I say, Well, I don't know what to tell you.
He said Was the damage repair over $500?
I said I really don't know State Farm sent someone out to fix it and they did unneccessary things like rip a larger whole in the ceiling.. and that is not my problem. Even the tenants below felt it was not right.
He continued to try and push me in a corner. WTF he says he's MY claims rep yet he's treating me like a criminal. I kept saying You can call my agent. Then I called John who called Eric, but he's out today. So we wait until tomorrow. Nobody pushes ME in a corner....nobody!!! Hmph.

Cleaning The Closet

So i've been forced to clean out my closet by John. He's been on my case forever to do it.. and I know I have to do it.. but when do I ever have time? I have more important things to do with my limited free time! Yesterday I decided to get down to business. Plus I had to pull out stuff to give to Goodwill so I can get my $500 tax write off! I managed to get SIX whole bags of clothes. I am impressed with myself. I had hoped John would be equally impressed as asking a girl to get rid of clothes and shoes...thats big. It was very painful for me to do too.

It took me 3 hours and I probably could have gone on longer except it was time to put Khai to bed..so I cleaned up and stopped. I should have taken pictures along the way because the entire bedroom and closet was a mess. I finally go to get the camera and who knows where the memory card went to..so I grabbed the next best thing..my cellphone..which took a crap picture..but here is one of my shoe mountain. This is just some of what I pulled out from the closet. The rest disappeared into the bathroom and some were still in the closet. Others Khai made away with. I don't even know how this much can possibly fit in my closet, but I feel I don't have enough. I never have any shoes to wear!!!

Take Your Title and Shove It

Why do some people feel that just because someone has a fucking title/degree...like MD or PHD or whatever..... that they must be some super smart fantastic someone?? I hate how they will gush and gush about so and so and their fancy title or degree. Hate how they think these people are like God or something and how great it must be to be them. No, I'm not jealous.. I’m just annoyed at the fact that people are so fucking narrow minded and think like this. Whats just as bad are the ones with these titles/degrees...who walk around thinking they are better than you.

More Tantrums

Khai woke up angry. Then got angrier when I didn't let him climb up the stairs. Then got even angrier when I tried to change his diaper...and put his coat on. Arched his back and refused to let me put him in his carseat. Thank goodness for Dora. Dora made the ride to grandma's bearable. The tantrum was put on pause... until we got there. Tantrum started up again and he spit mango on me. Got mad because now we didn't let him go down the stairs. Mad because nothing was going his way. Wow. Is this how its going to be??
When I stopped by to visit him at lunchtime, he was so mad at me from the morning that he wouldn't even look at me. And then when he did...he glared. He wouldn't come to me, wouldn't sit in my lap. He just didn't want me!! Finally I suckered him by carrying him on my back and galloping around the room. Or maybe he suckered me. Hmmm. Then we played chase. That made him really happy until I stopped to eat my lunch and we were back to the howling fits. He was flipping out when I left to go back to work.

BM is a Moron

It always bothers me how BM can just send Carter to the home of a stranger and not give it a second thought. I know she knows that Carter is safe with his dad.. but she has no clue who I am. She has seen me twice...maybe three times.. and has said a total of what...a handful of sentences to me at most. But she has never taken the time to get to know who she is sending her son to. Lucky for BM I'm not as evil as I grump. Lucky for BM, I'm more of a mother to her son than she is. She has been sending Carter to Johns long before I came along.. and I know his ex girlfriends were nothing like me. Stupid little cokehead whores. But I guess for BM...thats up her alley. Stupid girls and all. I wish I had a picture of this girl so you could see just how stupid she looks.

Oooh the Boogeyman

Ok, does my house have ghosts or something?? Three times already I've heard some random banging in my kitchen. There is nothing in there that could cause it. John heard it too. We both looked at eachother like WTF. No air vent, nothing. John also said that earlier today at his moms house he heard some noise upstairs and checked it out - nothing. Dog went nuts barking etc. Maybe John is being followed by a ghost. Great. When we first moved in here he told me one night he woke up and saw a woman standing at the foot of our bed. Wonderful! She was dressed in some old time dress, carrying a serving tray. As much as I love having the place to myself, it freaks me out. Me...the one who would prefer to watch a creepy movie any time over anything else... My mom told me that when she dies she's going to come haunt me. If I see her ghost, I will probably pee myself.

Biter

Khai bit me tonight. Ow. I know... I'm a wimp..and totally lame for taking a picture of it... John told me so.

More Helplessness

Really, WHAT do you do when all your baby does is cry and fuss and cry...and nothing you do helps him?? I am feeling a little more convinced its this damn tooth....but dunno. Today Khai felt a bit warm. I gave him some Tylenol, I even put a little Orajel on his gums..that stuff is nasty. I gave him an apple to chomp on. That kept him busy for a good while, but then he was back to crying. He threw the biggest fit at Target today. Everyone stared. Whatever. Thankfully John showed up and was able to help me manuever the cart around. Khai was happy momentarily when I let him run the aisle. We then went to Toys R Us, where again..he was allowed to run the aisle but then he decided he'd pull every lollipop off the display and shove one in his mouth. Sigh* We made it home in one piece thankfully. The rest of the night, he went on his bi-polar, multi personality...whatever you want to call it freakout. Then passed out for the night. I hope.
Just don't know how to help him. Every day has been getting worse and worse. Sometimes I worry that its more than just his tooth. Like maybe this is his personality. Maybe he's going to grow up to be some bratty kid. And I hate thinking that way!!! But when you spend countless minutes laying in the dark trying to get your child to sleep...all you have is time to think.

ELMO

I can't believe this Elmo was marked down from $19.99 to $6.99.... then today I saw it again for only $4.99!!!! Toys R Us. Khai LOVES it!

Sweet!!

Our 1st Noise Complaint

So its finally happened. The neighbors below us complained that we are too loud. Particularly in the mornings. I'm sure they mean ALL the time... but they chose the morning as their main complaint. Bleh. The people below us are really nice. We've spoken to them on several occassions.. John has helped them put up curtains, I've flooded their kitchen, they've given us coffee. Its a good, neighborly relationship. Except we are now official noisemakers. Booooo.
I feel bad. Moreso, now i'm super paranoid about every single move I make...thinking can they hear this? But at the same time, what am I supposed to do? Khai is ONE.. one year olds make noise. Kids make noise. We live in a condo. The floors are shit. The carpets are shit. The padding needs replacing. We are broke. So.
I asked John what they said exactly when he saw them. He said he was walking in the hallway and they just randomly blurted out You guys are noisy! But he said they said it nicely.
He said he was sorry and that we try to keep it down as best as possible. He said the wife told him its mainly in the mornings that she can hear everything we are doing. He tells her Khai wakes up super early.
I have the rubber alphabet mat in the living room - of course for Khai to play on - but also as a semi padding... hoping it would buffer any noise. Maybe I should get another one for the bedroom. I am also going to have to take his walker away from him in the mornings and his popcorn popper pusher thing. What the hell do you call those damn things anyways.
I'm wondering if her complaint stems from many mornings worth of noise, or this weekend when Khai dropped all the stuff into the tub, including the popcorn popper thingy.... and me roaring and carrying on with him. I don't know. Bah. To top it off, the neighbors down the hall, THEIR kids are super noisy. Running up and down the halls at all hours. And now i'm all paranoid that the neighbors below thing their noise is our noise!
I hate living here.

Flu Shot Today

Took Khai for his 2nd and final round of the flu shot today. It happened that the appt. was right at his nap time. I expected it would be a rough morning, but surprisingly it went well. He was a little tired when we got there but practically flew out of my arms when he saw the wire/bead maze table thingy in the waiting room. He played with it a while, then went from table to table touching each one...then back to the wire/bead. Then he decides he's superman and pushes the table across the room, then tips it over. Nothing was going to stop him... but then some other patients show up and it was hilarious b/c this one Asian guy comes in with his infant and Khai is standing there for like a good 5 mins just staring at the man. You could tell the guy was uncomfortable, but what was he going to do. Then this little girl comes in with her daddy and Khai is yapping away to them until the daddy talks back to Khai, at which point he becomes super shy and runs back to me.
The shot went really well, he cried b/c when I put him on the table but that was it. Got his shot and got out of there. Came home and he passed out for about 2 hours. The rest of the day was not so bad. Not as bad as last night, but still clingy and fussy and he barely ate today.
And as usual...he didn't get a damn sticker after his appt. Stupid nurse!

Mind Your Own Business!!

How could I forget to post this.

On Saturday I was at the Walmart, looking for something for Johns nieces for Christmas.. Khai was squirming in my arms so I set him down so he could happily explore. He walked over to a shelf where one of the store employees was stocking and he happened to trip over his feet and fell forward, banging his head on the floor. He instantly got a knot and bruise but overall, he was fine. He cried of course..but who wouldn't. I scooped him up, gave him lots of kisses and hugs and what happens...the fucking woman comes over to me and asks if he's ok and then has the nerve to tell me that I shouldn't let him walk around like that. That I shouldn't put him on the ground. WHAT THE FUCK! FUCK YOU! What, I should just hoist him on my shoulders and parade around the store?? He tripped over his feet. It was an accident. He's not bleeding. Go trip yourself bitch!! Don't tell me I shouldn't let him walk, dont' tell me I shouldn't put him down. Its not like I left a helpless infant laying in the aisle and walked away!!
I hate people.

Fuck You Dad

I hate my Dad. And yet why do I even bother to respond to his emails? And if he called me today (which he never will anyways) I would speak to him. WHY?? This asshole left us when I was a year old. He gave my mom $100 for child support per month. How the hell was she supposed to raise a child with $100??? She did it anyways. Years later it was bumped to a whopping $150. Wee. I still get the money. I don't know why, but he never cut the payments when I turned 18...saying he'd pay until I was done with college. But then it took me forever...like what..11 years?? to finish. Not because I was lazy.. in fact I went every single year and semester..including summers... but because I couldn't afford to go full time. I hate to work full time, so I could pay tuition.. because my jackass daddy only sent $150. OK...truthfully it took me so long b/c I had no idea what I wanted to do...so I took alot of classes...and then went to VCU where I screwed around, got bad grades, kicked out of school, came back home...but still...I went to school nonetheless and when I finally moved back to Northern VA.. I got my shit together and went for a psych degree...and got perfect grades and made the Deans list every semester..and graduated. I turned myself around. BUT, even when I was screwing around in school, I still worked. I always ALWAYS had a job, since I was 14 or so. Even while I received student loans, I still worked so I could afford things. No thanks to jackass. My mom has always been my mom and my dad. She has devoted her entire life to me, just like I am doing for Khai.

When jackass retired, he told me he was going to stop the payments because he needed the extra $150 since he'd be retired. WTF. But then, he never stopped the payments...and I didn't say a thing. I mean, why? I think he kept paying b/c he felt guilty. Guilty for being an ass and leaving us. Leaving me. Leaving every other kid he's had. Three from the first wife, then two in Vietnam right before my mom (altho we are only sure that one is his), then me, then he has three from the marriage after my mom, but they are hers, but he was there for them while they grew up...not his own blood. And now, now he's married to some younger Thai woman and built a huge house for her in Thailand, for her...her family, her kids. Asshole. And then..even though he retired, he took on contract work and is constantly travelling so he can get away from home b/c her family has pretty much moved in and he's always complaining about it.
Stupid fuck. Serves you right.
Then.. I get pregnant and I email him to tell him about it. This is part of his response (sent a MONTH later):

Haven't had a chance to answer your e-mail. Not that I'm shocked or anything - just busy as hell. By the time I get home at night after being out in this sun all day it's a bite to eat, a shower and crash until the next morning. I'm getting to old for this shit. One of these days I'm going to really retire!

WTF is this?!! Your daughter tells you she is pregnant...and you wait a whole month to respond...and blame it on being tired??

There is this guy I know (Avi), who knows one of my sisters (the one who is also mixed Vietnamese)...and he also knows asshole because he was the one who found him when she went looking for her American daddy...after she came here as a refugee...after he left her and her mother back in Vietnam after she was born. Anyways, he and I talk from time to time and he also talks to the jackass and sometimes tells me what he says in emails. So one day he forwards me this email from him:

Kim,
I asked Roger if he had given anything to you for a baby shower. This is his asshole reply.
Avi

From: Roger T. Sent: Friday, March 24, 2006 6:34 AM
To: Avi Z.

Not until October,
No I haven't given her anything yet. Maybe I can stop paying her child support now that she's 30 and pregnent

Oh but it gets better..... Avi played dumb to see what he would say:

From: Avi Z.
To: Roger Turpen Date: Sat, 25 Mar 2006 06:52:21 -0500

I had no idea you were still paying child support…

From: Roger T. Sent: Saturday, March 25, 2006 11:20 AM
To: Avi Z.

Yup, It was suspose to stop when she turned 18, but dumb shit opened his big mouth and told her as long as she was going to school I would continue it for pocket money or whatever. After 2 years she quit, but started going to night school a couple of nights a week so it continued. She finally finished up and just as I was going to tell her I was stopping the allotment she tells me she's pregnant. I'm sure she has come to rely on it and will now need it even more. Fuck me - fucked again!
It's not much there, but would certainly pay the electrict bill in Thailand and buy a bottle of scotch
Roger

Lovely. I hope he drowns in his bottle of scotch.
Then a week later, its my birthday and he sends me this:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Damn you're starting to make me feel a little old
Have a good one. I will have a birthday drink for you
DAD

Uh huh. Don't go spending all your money on me daddy.

Then I have Khai. I email him and tell him right away. For what though. I really don't know. He didn't respond for ten full days. October 23 I get an email and of course... of course....he was busy...working, tired, bla blah bleh. Whatever. I did try and include him in on things Khai was doing ... then I got to the point where I just decided why the fuck do I care so much? Why the fuck am I even bothering?? I stopped sending pictures. Then yesterday I get an email from him. Its been months. I never received that baby shower gift he claimed he would send in October. I never got a happy birthday grandson. I never got anything. Then this email comes with just ONE sentence. No hello, no how is Khai doing, no how are you doing. Nothing. Just one sentence that says:

I know being a mother is a full time job, but are there any Khai albums since April last year???

What was the need for the THREE question marks?? And if he had paid attention to ANYTHING I ever sent to him..he would have known that Khai has a blog that he could easily check in on. Where does he get off sending me this?? And why...WHY did I write back telling him (again) about Khai's blog and that he can go check it and see everything he has been up to for the past 13 months. Why didn't I just email him and tell him off like i'd like to do?
I can feel the fire burning under my skin.

Helpless

One of the worst things is the feeling of helplessness when Khai is not ok. When I don't know what is wrong with him and can't help him. Or when me holding him close is just not cutting it and no matter what I do, he still is in pain.
Today was one of those days.

At 5pm he burst out in screams. Not the regular screams you sometimes get, but the kind where you know SOMETHING is wrong. But what?? I searched his body...nothing seemed wrong. No bruises, cuts... The screams just came out of nowhere. One minute he was playing, the next he was standing there in the middle of the room crying. The only thing I could figure that maybe, just maybe it was... was his tooth coming thru. I had thought it had already pierced thru the skin but apparently not. The gum looks a little swollen...but what do I know. I have no clue what a swollen gum really looks like. I mean, I think I could know...but when it comes down to it.. I don't. And then the more I stare at it...the more confused I get. So maybe its swollen, maybe its not. He has been putting his fingers in the same spot all day. Slobbering some. He's never been a drooler like some teething babies. But he's had a little more of a leaky mouth than normal. I just don't know. We gave him some infant Motrin. I don't know if that was good to do either. Then I started to get paranoid that i'm over-medicating my child. I know realistically one dose won't harm him.... but then I worry that I gave it to him when he didn't need it. What if it wasn't his tooth. I just don't know!!! He was still so very upset, so I gave him the one and only thing I knew would soothe him. My boob. So there we were, sitting on the couch, me craddling him like when he was a baby. He was sobbing so hard, so upset... I sang the Dora theme song, then every other Dora song I know...and that seemed to work. He stopped crying to hear the songs... me and my terrible singing...but it worked. He dozed off, still sobbing under his breath until he was out. I was so uncomfortable on the couch, but I was afraid to move, afraid he would wake up. So I sat there, half leaning to the left, holding myself up as best as I could. Finally when I felt he was sleeping a little deeper, I was about to shove a pillow behind my back for support. For almost 2 hours I sat there...he was sweating so badly, my arm was drenched in sweat, I could feel it dripping down my stomach. My arm itched where his head was but I didn't want to move him. It drove me nuts...but I didn't move a muscle. Eventually I felt it was safe to turn the TV back on... and of course there was absolutely nothing on. John stopped playing video games so I asked him to watch a movie with me. We started to watch Hatchet and then Khai woke up - totally dazed and confused, crying, screaming, shaking. I ended up taking him to the bedroom and BF'ing him again until he fell asleep. He has since woken up three times, but overall seems better. I don't know. Maybe it was the tooth afterall and now the Motrin has kicked in? He is still very clingy. Even in his sleep. He holds on tight, his arms and legs drapped over me and if I move he grabs on tighter. I just hope everything is ok and tomorrow things will be normal again. Tomorrow I take him for part 2 of his flu shot. I'm sure he'll be pissed off. But then we'll come home and go right for a nap. The appt. is at 9am..the only time I could get - right when he normally has a nap. Its not going to be a fun morning. Poor Khai. I just feel so bad for him today. I want to be able to fix every bad thing that happens to him and know thats not possible...but I will damn well try!

Drinking from a Cup

My little big boy...is always wanting to drink from a big cup. He spills it everywhere but he's so into doing it. If you have a cup, he wants it. If you give him his own, he doesn't want it. He's so crazy. Here are some pictures of him on Thanksgiving day drinking out of Daddy's cup. I love how he looks "drunk" after he got his fill...and the red rings on his face make him look like The Joker.

Pet Peeve

One of my biggest pet peeves is when someone tells you that you are being a certain way or that you did something...that you didn't!!! Like if someone insists you are mad, but you aren't, but they keep insisting..and of course then you get mad. I can't let it go. It burns me up!!! Earlier this morning I was leaning against the couch and John adjusted it so I fell back a little. No big deal. I didn't make a big deal out of it. I just looked back to see what was going on. He gets VERY dramatic...yet telling me i'm being Sooooooo dramatic... that I acted like I was falling. WTF!~!! This is news to me! I was like Uh, no.. I just looked back! He shook his head. I could see the look in his eyes and the smirk on his face that he didn't believe me. That really REALLY irritated me. So I keep saying I didn't do anything!! Of course by now i'm seeming like a mad woman, dramatic and crazy... he's steady laughing at me, which pisses me off further. Grrrrr.

Cuddly Khai

I love that Khai is now starting to cuddle with me on his own. He'll crawl up to me and lean against me and snuggle in the most loving way. I LOVE it. Or he'll come up to me and scoot himself right into my lap and watch Dora. I was just laying on the floor a moment ago and he came up and leaned against me with his apple and shared it with me while stroking my hair. Ok, so maybe it wasn't the most gentle stroke, but he was doing it in his own way nonetheless. I love these moments. They are by far one of my most favorites!!!

BM Shocker

I'm totally surprised. John talked to BM and told her we cannot afford to give her the child support this month and she understood! She said she knows its tough this time of year and that she's not going to take him to court, she's not that cruel (she said this!). John said he told her it will be for the next two months. I hope she doesn't think she's getting double pay the following months. He assured me she doesn't. I'm just really surprised she's so OK with this. Very. I'm not sure what to think. I told John maybe she's not a bitch...but just stupid.

The Tree

Finally got around to finishing the tree. Got the presents wrapped, the stockings hung and random things shoved in them. Why though, with all that under the tree, is there NOTHING for me?!!! EVERYONE has something except poor me. Boo hoo hooo.

Stupid Pippi Picture

There. Pippi. Good grief. Why this wouldn't post in the last posting I don't know... and now Khai is really WIDE AWAKE....

Pippi

I wear my hair in pig tail braids alot. Most often its because its quick and easy and I don't have to think about how my hair looks. But the one thing I cannot stand is people who say HEY PIPPI!! when they see me. Do I really look like this? I mean WTF. SHUT THE HELL UP ALREADY!! It is not cute.



* and now i'm really frustrated with blogger b/c it won't save and it won't post the images I am trying to post and its been annoying me for half an hour now and I just give up..plus Khai just woke up and its 11:30pm and he's smacking the keyboard and he won't go back to sleep...
ALL I wanted to do was post a damn picture of that stupid Pippi Longstocking...to say I DON"T LOOK LIKE THAT GIRL!!!! But apparently that is too much to ask for... ARG!!!!!!

Racial Discrimination?? WTF!

So things are starting to get tight around the office as far as internet usage and email is concerned. All because idiots abuse it to the point that we all have to pay the consequences.
First emails of mine started getting quarantined. Emails that I wrote, emails that I received. This is still happening, but i'm usually able to release them. Today though I sent an email about the AC unit in my area and immediately get an email saying I have violated some racial discrimination something or rather. WTF?!! I never said a single racial thing in the email! All I said was it was hot and when I was asked why I didn't turn the AC on, I said my neighbor is cold and so I turn the fan on instead and that I didn't want to hear her mouth. That is it. Nothing bad.. . but apparently I don't know what i'm talking about because i'm being racial according to the computer program thats in place to bust me now. Stupid computer. Stupid program. Stupid quarantine. Not to mention, now we are banned from the internet except for during our two 15 minute breaks. This is insane. I cannot function without my internet usage!!! And all this because of the losers who abuse it....streaming video all day long when they have been told numerous times not to, clogging up the system... I feel like I work in a nazi camp. Last week they asked us to email them our hours..when we come in, when we leave, when we take lunch. Next they'll want to know when I go to the bathroom. I am so annoyed. Blah!

Scared of Mommy

Last night, for the very first time EVER, Khai was scared of me! I had some dark nailpolish on my feet and he's never seen that before. He freaked out. Wouldn't come near me. Ran from me. Bawled his eyes out. It broke my heart! My baby was scared of ME!!! Thankfully, he's changed his mind...because today he's been having fun with my feet...which chase and stomp right in front of his toes and cracks him up. Weird kid.

Dancing Khai

Khai dancing and clapping to a song on Dragon Tales.

Our First Tree

We just bought and put up our very first Christmas tree ever. We barely have any decorations but figured we'd build a collection over the years.

So far, I've got one strand of garland on and then I realized we don't have enough. Now i'm thinking I want to take it down totally and just put lights up. I don't know yet. Lights AND garland? Or just lights?

Chatterbox

Khai has been a little chatterbox for quite some time now. Here is some of his latest. My camera is so crappy and it skips... blah. So until I get something better, i'll post crappy, skippy videos.

Toy Bin

Here is the $20 toy bin I got at Big Lots for Khai. Not super impressed, but it'll do for now.
Khai loves taking his blocks and balls out of the bins on the shelf and putting them into the box below. Each time yelling at it. Cracks me up..

Apple Boy

Khai Loves Apples. He ate his first real, whole apple on his 1st birthday at Grandma's house. He looked SO cute. We did the traditional ceremony where you have a tray of things and see what the baby picks - determines their future etc. Things on the tray: money, pens, toys, food... What Khai picked: ALL the food.
Since then, he gets an apple at least once a week. I would give him more if I spent more time with him during the week day. Grandma doesn't like to give him a full apple because she thinks he'll choke.

Girly Mags

Oh my goodness.. I never thought i'd see the day when I had to deal with a little boy flipping through "girlie mags". For the past few days, Carter has been shutting himself in the bathroom, checking out my Cosmo. hahahaa. I gotta laugh. Its actually pretty cute. And hilarious what he's finding interest in. Funny how he thinks he's being so secretive, yet using the hall bathroom and funny how he freaks out when he thinks he's busted. He was just in the bathroom a while ago for the longest time. John and I snuck over and looked under the door to see where his feet where b/c he claimed he was pooping. We heard the pages turning.. then he must have noticed we were sneaking .. and the door flew open. We both scattered. John asked him right away if he was looking at Cosmo and he said yes. I asked what he was looking at, was it the girls? He said Yes. I said Do you like girls? Are they pretty? Yes. John said the Cosmo goes. I told him its harmless. I dunno. I know nothing.. but at least he's not looking at Maxim or whatever else.. We flipped thru all the pages to see what he was looking at and there was absolutely nothing that I considered "bad". Maybe I shouldn't leave my magazines in the bathroom? I don't know.
The day before, he was in there with it and I knocked on the door b/c he had been in there SO long. He fumbled and said he was using mouth wash. Then I heard him open the cabinet and get it out then he flung the door open and shoved the bottle in my face...SEE?? Mouthwash.
Uh Huh. Ok.
Maybe its cute to me right now b/c its not my child? I don't know what I'll think the day I find out Khai is looking at girlie mags. I already hate his future girlfriend.....

Grumpy and Alone.

Its Saturday afternoon and Khai and I are stuck at home with nothing to do.
He woke up at 5am and that was it. He was done with sleep. I had hoped he would have fallen asleep for a good long nap, but no luck. 9 am I went to put him down for his nap. He fussed and cried and screamed and tried numerous times to dive head first off the bed. I gave up. We went to the living room where I turned on some music, turned down the lights and let him play until he got bored. By 10:30am he came to me crying. Nap time. He fought a while longer and finally FINALLY shut his eyes. Noon, he woke up. I made him some lunch which I had to beg him to eat - visual: me crawling around on my hands and knees, him chewing on a spoon and a cup of YoBaby yogurt. Finally got him to eat every last drop and now I'm working on this tapioca.. he's working on stuffing as many things as possible into his air popper.
I called John who had left earlier today with Carter, to see what they were doing. Carter was playing with his friends so I said I'd call my mom to see if she'd want to have lunch ( she and I discussed this yesterday). She wasn't home. Called John back, but by then Carter had already asked if he could have lunch with his friends. SO what does this mean for me? It means John isn't coming home. It means Khai and I are sitting here with nothing to do. It means I guess I'll just have to go out with Khai, alone, again, as usual. John said I could bring Khai to him (he's at his moms). Yeah right. Why would I drive all the way over there, drop Khai off then drive all the way back to our area - where I'd shop?? Not to mention, I have limited time if I'm away from Khai... I don't want to waste half of it driving. AND, there is no way in hell I'm leaving Khai. So, now I'm just going to sit here and sulk, feed Khai the rest of this tapioca, take a shower IF I'm lucky enough to do so, and maybe, just maybe I'll manage a trip to Walmart.. weee. I mean really, what am I supposed to do? Call up John and tell him to tell Carter he can't have lunch with his friends? I'm not that cruel. Blah.

Hey I'm a coddler!

I'm a coddler. I coddle my son. This is what i've been informed of one time too many. And at some point someone is going to get hurt if they don't shut up. If me being a loving mother is considered coddling? Then I guess I coddle. Deal. Yes, I do everything for my son. I do crawl around on my hands and knees feeding him his dinner as he laughs and runs away from me. I do have a million and one toys spread clear across the house, under anything you look, in everything you look. There are cherrios everywhere. And yes, Khai has more clothes than is necessary and dammit i'll keep on buying him more. The other day John told me that Khai has too many toys, that he gets too many things and that him not getting him anything on his 1st birthday ever, was not a big deal because of this. Yeah...NO.
Right now John is sleeping on the couch - aka, his bed. He's not thrilled about not sleeping in our bed but I think he's gotten used to it. He doesn't really bug me about it as much anymore though there are occassions. Right now, Khai is sprawled out in the bed, yes that would be our bed....the very bed that John hasn't been in for over a year now. Yes...I do co-sleep with Khai and yes, I'm still doing it and yes I plan to keep on doing it. Its where I know Khai is safe, warm, and happy. Do I care about anything else? No. If he were sleeping in his own crib right now, I know he wouldn't be happy and I know he really wouldn't sleep through the night. I know my son. And I refuse to let him lay in there and cry his little heart out to the point of throwing up. Not going to happen. I'm not going to train him on how to sleep. He's not a dog. People in many cultures sleep like this..its never been a problem. It seems more so of an issue with this society. I dunno.. maybe i don't know what i'm talking about.. but i know this is what works for us.
What works is for my son to be happy. He's not going to turn into a brat just because of the things I do for him... I was raised the same way..am I a brat? Ok..don't answer that. :-P

SLOW Children At Play

I love these signs. They crack up each and every time I see one. I am most definitely going to hell. As if it wasn't warning enough when my son was born with a crooked toe....I continue to laugh.

This weekend we went to the pumpkin patch. I was fortunate enough to have not one, but TWO sightings of the sign (attached).

There's this site called...you guessed it, Slow Children At Play. It's written by a guy named Stokie Jaye, who works in a group home for emotionally disturbed boys. His online journal of his day to day encounters with these kids. If you haven't checked it out already, do so. Read it all, from start to finish. If you have the same sense of humor as me, I guarantee you will enjoy it. I am always coming back to see if he's posted a new entry...
I really shouldn't be enjoying this, but the way he tells the story...you can't help but.

What to do for Khai's 1st?

Trying to figure out what to do for Khai's 1st birthday has driven me mad for the past month or more. I went back and forth between Dora and Elmo and Halloween and a million other themes. In the end I decided I'd do something Dora because he loves her so much. John felt it was too girlie and suggested Diego..from Go Diego Go (Dora's BOY cousin). Nah. I wrestled with the whole Dora thing for awhile and finally decided i'd go with a Halloween Dora theme. Perfect. Even better when I found the Halloween episode of Dora - Khai's all time favorite video. We watch it at least 6 times per day and John and I find ourselves singing the songs and saying the lines without realizing we are doing it.

Back to the party theme - I had such a hard time figuring out what to do for the invite until Trish put a great one together for me... but then I couldn't find anything for the decorations. I found more Halloween things than Dora - actually I found plenty of Dora things but nothing I liked... SO...now we are going with a Halloween theme... the decorations will stay up the rest of the month and most likely all the way thru Christmas knowing us....

Was it supposed to be this hard?

Wee! Halloween is almost here!

Halloween is fast approaching. I am just a little too excited. But now that Khai is here, things are just a bit different. So long ago were the days when all I had to think about was what I was going to do on the best day ever.
Last year, I was home with a newborn Khai...sporting the natural Zombie look myself and stuffing my poor baby into a pumpkin costume - a gift from a friend. I personally would have opted for a more devilish costume, but at that point I had barely left the house aftering giving birth. His revolt made it evil enough.


This year, thanks to Jen and Nev's marvelous discovery at none other than Old Navy - Khai AND Cooper will be skunks. Somehow, while not the "evil" costume I had initially sought...it fits perfectly. In its own way it truly is genius for multiple reasons. The skunk itself represents the truth of the child...the funk that amazingly permiates from his ass, and his attitude at times. Rotten = Evil. And yet still, people will find it cute. And... (thanks Nev for your smarts)....it makes for a perfect winter coat.

Here is a preview of whats in store. So far, Khai is unsure of it all.

In years prior to Khai...the fun..oh the fun of Halloween. I have a feeling however that from here on (at least for now) my Halloween's will be all about Khai and taking him house to house racking up on free candy, much to John's delight. Kid gets the candy...big kid eats it all...

This photo proves nothing has changed since the last time I dressed up 2 years ago - I'm still looking dead...just for different reasons now. Thanks Khai.

Haircut Disaster

This Mommy and scissors are not a good combo. Very dangerous. For multiple reasons of course, however yesterday the danger involved my baby's hair.
Sweet, cute, adorable little Khai...he has/had(??) a really great head of hair. But it was growing fast and wild. I really wanted to just let it grow out long.....see where it would go and hoped for little curls at the bottom. And it did start curling, right in the back. But the front was another matter. He sported the Donald Trump comb over and the color is a near match. Plus with the summer heat, I know he was roasting. Last night as he pounded away on the laptop, I pulled out the scissors. Two snips. That’s all I did. It was two snips too many. And he squirmed.....and the scissors squirmed...and the chop went crooked up his forhead. He was left with one side short and goofy and the other side still how it originally was. Initially I busted out laughing. This brought John out to see what was going on. When he took a look at my poor victim, he immediately banned me from cutting his hair again. Ever. Neverever.
After taking a look at the disaster...he told me he wasn't sure if he could fix it...other than chopping the other side off to even it all out - thus making him look even goofier. Sigh*
We waited until he was dead asleep and snuck in with scissors and a brush.... John took a few snips...I took a few photos.... today, thankfully, he looks decent enough.
I will never do this again. BAD MOMMY!! BAD!!!

Itching, Scratching, Digging....

WHY. WHY. WHHHHY....do I work with complete idiots and gross nasties?
This little post takes us back to Ms. Crotchy. The past two days I cannot tell you why she is doing this...I assume because she hasn't showered in god knows how long and itches like something mad.....I hate to even think of it.. but she has come into my cube, proceeded to shove her hand into her crotch, dig around, then shove it up her butt and do the same. All the while talking to me about a case.
Today was even worse. She came over, talk talk talk...hand flew in direct passage to her crotch, she dug, then proceeded to the butt, THEN cupped the very hand over her nose and mouth.

WHAT THE HELL??!!!!

Bobby Light - Dirty Girl

For those of you who watch the show Rob & Big and love it like I do...you will have most likely feasted your eyes upon the worlds hottest R&B sensation, Bobby Light during lasts weeks episode. I cannot get enough of this video. I am addicted to it like Squishee's. I have just watched it 8 times in a row and plan to watch it 8 more...cracking up each and every time because Bobby Light is gonna do you right. I want the flashlight on a chain....
Personal Message to Bat: I will fight you anyday, anytime for Bobby Light. You name the spot. He's mine.

This Is The End....

So sad. So Lonely. The End of the Squishee cup.
I have officially been branded a Squishee addict by my friend Amy. I guess I have been talking about it a little too much. Maybe. They don't know addict. Not yet. I don't like how the cup empties so fast. Stupid cup.
Mmmmm. Squisheee.

Who Needs A Kwik-E-Mart? I Dooooo

I don't frequent 7-11 on a regular basis. No time anymore. But today, I made it a point to go to get myself a Squishee thanks to Nev and his postthat they were there...just waiting for the taking! Which flavor to get? Ooh, too many choices.. but then do I really want to mix them all up?I did. I think I have 5 flavors going in this 22oz cup right now. After filling the cup, I noticed the collectible cups. Dammit. But really..where do I have roomto keep collectible cups? Then, the 6 different colors of straws..... I went with the green today. Then I popped the lid on, but there was room for more so I went forthe coke flavor and overflowed the cup. Tomorrow I go back. Different color straw, different flavors. Damn, my cup is already empty. I haven't even ventured over to the pink donuts yet. Hopefully I can rope someone into walking over with me from the office. If not, I'll be the only one in the office slurping down a Squishee and they will all be jealous.Nev...you da man...for steering me in the right direction today! Thank you, Come Again.

Big Boy

One of the most amazing things to me is watching Khai grow. Last night I was going through some of his old pictures - ones just from a few months ago.Wow. WOW. The changes blow my mind. Watched some old video clips of him...him with hiswobbly head with little sprouts for hair making little squeaks and grunts and now...he's a head full of hair, babbling away at me,saying momma and a million other things. His little personality is really starting to shine through but nothing has changed as far as who is in charge. KHAI. I’m already missing the teeny tiny little him. I can just see myself bawling my eyes out when he's 20. This is happening WAY too fast.

Tuesday

The past few nights Khai and I have been staying at my moms place while John finishes working on the loft. The nice thing about it is waking up and just handing Khai over to grandma aka daycare provider and rolling out of the house and actually getting to work early!
Yesterday I had to run by the condo after work to pickup my contacts. While driving home I felt so weird because I didn't have a crying baby in the backseat and had this flashback of life before baby. Me...leaving work, not having to go pickup Khai from my moms, getting home at a decent time, doing things for myself around the house at my own pace.I enjoyed it. For a moment there, I considered hitting happy hour. Then I realized I had to head back to reality. There was a sweet little boy waiting for me at grandma's.
Called my mom up to tell her I was on my way and she put Khai on the phone. Not that he has a clue where Mommy's voice is coming from.....but he knows it and he knows this time of day is when I should be there... he started walking to the front door looking for me. Ok, he didn't walk on his own...but he walked dammit and he knew Mommy was supposed to come in thru the front door!! He is so smart.
We had our own little happy hour playing with his plastic car and links and Mr. Le French Kat. Then he dined on milk and a few wheat thins and cheese and back to the living room to play. I spent the last half hour of his evening crawling around the floor meowing, barking, and oinking at him. I love how he cracks up - that belly laugh. Cracks me up too. We both fell over eachother laughing and then he farted in my arms as I held him.
He's so great.

Daycare Frustration

Arg, it is so frustrating trying to find a daycare provider. Up until now my mom has been watching Khai, however, he's really working her physically. Today she's laid up in bed with a jacked up back. This all came about yesterday and ended with me having to come pick him up at noon. This morning when I went to drop him off, she could barely get out of bed. Called into work again and who knows what will happen tomorrow. My plans for taking next week off have been cancelled so I can make up the time lost this week. The rest of my morning today has been spent looking at daycare centers, home care, all that crap. I might as well quit my job and stay home rather than work a full time job just so I can pay for childcare services! Good grief.

I really don't know how SAHM's do it... what do you do all day long to keep your child entertained?? I can barely make it thru this post without him climbing all over me and the laptop and sticking everything in his mouth and his fingers up his nose.
Thankfully Barney has just come on and i've secured him in my lap... whatever the lure of that damn dinosaur is...I don't know and I don't care. He's quiet and content for the moment....

Picture of The Day: I love Khai.

Damn Management

The water drama continues....
So now we sit and wait. Wait to see what the people below us will decide to do. I called our insurance company yesterday and he said no claim has been filed and to just sit tight. Okkk.
In the meantime we get a certified letter from the condo management - it's a bill for $125 for the locksmith they had to call to break into our unit. They said that because they didn't have a phone number for us, they were forced to call the locksmith. I wrote them a letter back telling them that "Marty" from their office called only once and left a msg saying she tried numerous times to reach us and has finally found our number on a check we sent them. So my question is, how did she try to reach me numerous times? Obviously I wasn't home...so knocking on my door would get her nowhere. And she says she didn't have my number until after her attempts.
Thing is, they DO have all our numbers. If they would have simply opened up my damn file. In the amount of time it took her to hunt down my check, call the locksmith, wait for the locksmith to get there and break into our place...she could have pulled my file, called me and I would have been there. As far as i'm concerned they can pay the bill themselves.

Humpty Dumpty The Rolly Polly

Good God... how did this happen again?? See
Mommy Don't Cry for time # 1. Can I feel any worse? First he falls, then I flood the house, then he falls again. Sigh* These middle of the night rolls are getting out of control, but I feel like the evil mom letting him cry away in his crib. And him cuddling up to me nice and tight at night is the best feeling ever.... until he let's go and decides to take a dive off the bed.

I Officially Hate Water

First Khai falls out of bed at 3am and scares the shit out of me. It took me all night and the whole next day to recover. I wondered what kind of mom am I? How did I not hear him stir?? I ALWAYS hear him stir! But not this time. 3am he's up and rolling around and then BOOM.....followed by WAAAAA! My poor baby landed on all fours and he has no clue what just happened to him. Everything is ok now. He's totally fine and most likely has forgotten the incident. But for me, his 8 month birthday is marked by his first fall. Sniff Sniff.Then, as if the AC problem wasn't bad enough, I've gone and flooded the kitchen... not just our kitchen but the condo downstairs too. Perfect! Sleep deprived and in zombie mode I managed to leave the sink water running before I left for the day at 7am. 2pm the lady downstairs comes home to find her ceilling about to collapse. The idiot condo people can't find our number and eventually call a locksmith and break into our unit. John and I both have issues with that. What does make me laugh is I wonder what went thru their minds as they all barged into our home to see not just water everywhere but our skulls, knives, dolls in caskets, a huge chunk of bloody meat on the counter top, Dora or Barney or whoever blasting on the TV and Khai's toys sprinkled with baby rice puffs all over the floor. Thankfully the people downstairs are a really nice couple or this could go a lot worse than it already is. John went to check their kitchen out and it looks like the whole ceiling has to be replaced, walls painted, and dining room carpet steamed. Arg. Ahhh, but its not over yet! No, no. That would be too easy. So then I come into work. Exhausted, I want to make some coffee - but there is no sugar! Ok..so I go to buy a soda from the snackbar. Pull a coke out of the mini fridge and somehow the side of the can gets pierced and coke is fizzing and flying everywhere. The can explodes on me and I'm frantically looking around, getting sliced in the finger by the can and throwing the can in the trash next to the fridge. The trash can now starts to leak and soda is spilling onto the carpet outside of someobody's office. I pickup the can and run down the hall, soda flying out everywhere, from inside the can, from the bottom of the can... Into the kitchen I empty the trash can into a bigger can and now there's soda all over the counter and floor. After cleaning it up I take a look at my new injury. Long and deep...right on my middle finger. Someone is telling me fuck you. It's not even noon yet...

I Like Monkeys

I like monkeys.

The pet store was selling them for five cents a piece.

I thought that odd since they were normally a couple thousand.

I decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth.

I bought 200.

I like monkeys.
I took my 200 monkeys home.

I have a big car. I let one drive.

His name was Sigmund.

He was retarded. In fact, none of them were really bright.

They kept punching themselves in their genitals.

I laughed.

Then they punched my genitals.

I stopped laughing.
I herded them into my room.

They didn't adapt very well to their new environment.

They would screech, hurl themselves off of the couch at high speeds and slam into the wall. Although humorous at first, the spectacle lost its novelty halfway into its third hour.
Two hours later I found out why all the monkeys were so inexpensive: they all died.

No apparent reason.

They all just sorta dropped dead.

Kinda like when you buy a goldfish and it dies five hours later.

Damn cheap monkeys.
I don't know what to do.

There were 200 dead monkeys lying all over my room, on the bed, in the dresser,

hanging from my bookcase.

It looked like I had 200 throw rugs.
I tried to flush one down the toilet.

It didn't work.

It got stuck.

Then I had one dead, wet monkey and 199 dead, dry monkeys.
I tried pretending that they were just stuffed animals.

That worked for a while, that is until they began to decompose.

It started to smell real bad.
I had to pee but there was a dead monkey in the toilet and I didn't want to call the plumber.

I was embarrassed.
I tried to slow down the decomposition by freezing them.

Unfortunately, there was only enough room for two monkeys at a time

so I had to change them every 30 seconds.

I also had to eat all the food in the freezer so it didn't all go bad.
I tried burning them.

Little did I know my bed was flammable.

I had to extinguish the fire.

Then I had one dead, wet monkey in my toilet, two dead,

frozen monkeys in my freezer, and 197 dead, charred monkeys in a pile on my bed.

The odor wasn't improving.
I became agitated at my inability to dispose of my monkeys and to use the bathroom.

I severely beat one of my monkeys.

I felt better.
I tried throwing them away but the garbage man said that

the city was not allowed to dispose of charred primates.

I told him that I had a wet one.He couldn't take that one either.

I didn't bother asking about the frozen ones.
I finally arrived at a solution.

I gave them out as Christmas gifts.

My friends didn't know quite what to say.

They pretended that they liked them but

I could tell they were lying.

Ingrates.

So, I punched them in the genitals.
I like monkeys.

Oof.